Old Missoula

Queer Substitutes For Whiskey – Florida Water, Painkiller, Mustang Liniment and Soap Suds – Result of Mounted Police Rule – Big Snakes

The Canadian government has for the past few years been solicitous of settling up its Northwest Territories with a civilized and healthy population. Treaties have been made with nearly all the Indian tribes on a plan somewhat similar to the American system of opening farms for them and providing an annual payment per capita, to “continue so long as the sun shall shine and the rivers flow.” The savages, in return, to keep the peace with their Grandmother across the seas, not to molest the emigrant, adapt themselves as far as possible to civilized habits, and entertain a wholesome respect for the Mounted Police, who are supposed to have complete control of the vast country which has been placed in their almost absolute charge. At home in Canada, the advantages of settling in this country are painted in the most beautiful colors, and various inducements are offered to the emigrant to turn his steps toward the Northwest, but so long as the Government enforces its present prohibitory laws, preventing the people from getting drunk in a rational manner, the march of civilization will be uncertain and slow. It is true, the Lieutenant Governor is invested with the power of granting permits to purchase and bring into the Territory limited quantities of intoxicating liquors, to any respectable party who may apply for the same; but he cannot grant authority for its sale within his jurisdiction, upon any condition. On account of the long distances separating the seat of government from the police settlements, necessarily a long time must elapse ere a permit can be obtained, and then again a great while before it can procure the coveted commodity. The boys, by dint of long continued experiments, have acquired knowledge of several substitutes, which although injurious (illegible) possesses a sufficient stimulating power, and succeeds admirably in stealing away the brain.

Receiving an invitation one evening to attend a dance in progress at the house of a half-breed in a neighboring coulee, and time hanging rather heavily on my hands just then, I joyfully brushed the dust from my best coat, straightened my hair with a currycomb, and soon after was at the appointed place.

It was a large log-cabin, containing under its one roof the family living room and the indispensable “meat house.” There were no stables or other outbuildings, so I fastened my cayuse to the saddle of another, and following the tuning sounds of a fiddle I entered within. The moment after entering the first peculiarity noticed was a very strong and powerful odor of perfume – seeming rather strange in an assembly where the only “ladies” present were the girls of the prairie. The place was crowded to its utmost, but with the half-breed element predominating, and as everybody appeared to be in motion and talking at the same time in mixed languages the scene presented a rather confused picture. However, by dint of crowding and pushing I found myself in the corner taken up by the white men, and a seat was assigned me on a bale of dry meat where I was soon comfortably settled.

One of the boys now asked me to “take something,” handing me at the same time a cup containing a milky, muddy fluid. Upon inquiry as to the nature of the article he said, “Oh, this is a most excellent drink; it’s bay rum diluted with water and flavored painkiller.” A taste of the nauseating mixture was sufficient, and the cup was returned, but immediately after emptied, with apparent relish, by a Red river man. My friend seeming desirous of my comfort, said he would try and get me a drink of something really genuine. “You know,” said he, “we have yet a little of the ‘Permit article,’ but there was only a gallon in the start here, and we thought it best to keep it apart for the use of the girls.” After a short absence in an opposite corner, where an old superannuated grand dame superintended, he returned with a tumbler filled with a fluid as transparent as the other had been muddy. “This is the stuff to do your soul good,” said he, “drink hearty, old fellow.” I found it necessary now to take down a good sized dram, and I discovered it to be weakened alcohol mixed with the disguising perfume of “Florida Water.” “I thought,” said I, “that ‘Permit’ means good whisky.” “Oh yes, it does,” he replied, “but we double the game by sending slyly for alcohol, which goes a great deal farther.” Noticing after a while several freshly emptied patent medicine phials lying around loose, I inquired if any of the breeds were hurt, as they apparently used a great deal of “Mustang Liniment.” “Oh no,” said my friend, “it is used by the white boys; they drink it and some of them have become so used to it that they prefer it, on account of its oily quality, to harder drinks. The half-breeds,” he continued, “for occasions like this, make a stimulant of their own by boiling tea and tobacco together, which makes quite an intoxicating product.”

As the night advanced the effects of the different mixtures became apparent. Dancing in the small central space was kept up constantly. White men who did not understand a word of French seemed to keep up a familiar, easy conversation with girls that did not comprehend an idiom of English. Gestures and voices grew more animated and louder until midnight when many of the party were most gloriously drunk. I ventured to ask as to the effects which followed an indulgence of this kind, and was told that until the system had become accustomed to the treatment, the effects were rather bad to the health; but my informant went on to say: “We out here must have something, and among the natives nothing will excite pleasure except the presence of strong drink.” “Some of our boys,” he continued, “who crave such things, will drink anything whatever that contains alcohol. We brought along tonight three dozen flavoring extracts, and they were all drank up before you came, and I have known one fellow before now,” he went on, “that got beastly drunk on castile soap suds.”

The snakes produced by the continued use of the unusual make-up, are said to be very large. But such is life in Northwest Territories under its present system of laws.

C.S.

The above article appeared in The Benton Weekly Record on January 23, 1880.